I am reading my friend’s poetry for the first time. It is older that our friendship and it was hidden for almost 15 years. He is not planing to publish it or anything similar, simply he felt that it is the right moment to share it with me, after all this years. It was appropriate gift for my upcoming birthday! Trust packed into the verses.
Poetry does not belong to anyone, neither to author; poetry has it’s own life. I love to compare making art/creative process with giving a birth to a baby; I went through both.
Once when get’s out of you art becomes everyone’s asylum. You are delivery person, participating in divine process of creation. The purpose is giving.
If you are using certain art form to make a living or simply to survive, than keep in mind that once when creative process is finished, your art does not belong to you anymore. Once when gets exposed to a human eye, ear or mind every person will see it differently; your art will become a mirror for someone’s cognition of world, life or feeling. Be aware that you are doing it because you feel strong urge, stronger than sexual one, to shape your demons together with everything you once learned or experienced, imagined or dreamed of into the piece.
Once everything gets out, you are baptized.
Being a mother is the most important role for me and my biggest happiness, even though I understand completely that in my life, except my hard work, nothing else is in my control. Life is erratic.
If you give a thought to a fact that you are a parent and that you are guardian of someone’s life as long as you live, you will understand that they are living in your time, but that you are not living in theirs. Their time is just about to become, and most likely it will happen in the meantime, while you are getting to tired and/or to old. Besides of being your children, they are also humans with their own will, their future dreams, fears and hopes; with their lives which exclusively belongs to them, not to their parents or their future children.
They are beautiful artworks you witness existing; you can put your trust in them, your love and your prayers. You can guide them and be grateful and honored to play this role in screenplay called life. You should do your best to be a parent, a shelter, a listener, a friend, an angel guardian, but you should never ask for their gratitude at the end.
You chose to be their parent, they did not had a chance to chose to be your children.
That does not mean they are not thankful, it only means you need to let them be, and you need to be proud of them for whom they are. Nevertheless, allow to your children and to poetry to remind you what it is crucial in life; allow yourself to trust in unconditional love again.
I admire to children and I adore poetry. I admire and adore the pureness of heart. So, I beg you do not try to be a role model to your children or to use them as extension of your youth in order for you to accomplish your failed ambitions.
I beg you not to interpret the poetry based on author’s biography, even if you personally know the author, or if the author is yourself.