It’s in human nature to define things and figures, relations and feelings. Defining leads to better understanding, but it does not necessarily represent one’s comprehension of the causes, figures or relations happening in one’s life. People have tendency to believe in the existence of their own small universes. We are the main stars of our personal galaxies, yet the other people are our planets. But what many seem to forget is that you have to understand and define the relations within your solar system, in the way that each planet has its own orbit and satellites, otherwise, you will have a clash of planets and you will be forced to understand the end of endlessness.
I believe we can not cast people for any of positions within our solar system. There is a certain unspoken admissions process in life, during which some relations are crystallized while most of them get drowned in time. People need time, yet they don’t have much of it left, so they live in fear. Fear of losing time with wrong people on the wrong places committed to the wrong cause. But at the end, what you hunt is hunting you. All of us will encounter death alone.
If time is the only authority capable of labeling human relations, why do people feel an urge to define relations constantly, even before they tried to understand the nature of the relations? From our desire to define in order to understand, we tend to apply learned definitions on our relationships, instead of giving needed time for understanding it and defining it afterwards with the experience we gain.
The reality of our own resistance in our relationships with others is that no one is there by accident. There is a purpose to everyone’s presence and there is a reason behind maintained closeness. There is a bigger force which placed others into our lives and gave them certain tasks. The only thing we can assure, taking into the consideration that in ancient Greek, word cosmos meant “order, ornament”, is harmony.
It often happens that we consider someone to be one of planets we are surrounded with, but in their solar system we might be just asteroid, meteoroid or comet. Misunderstandings are inevitable, clashes as well, but our natural curiosity shall remain as the main reason for us to start, maintain and end our relations with others.
Do not forget that even chaos, which existed formlessly before the creation of the Universe, has unpredictable and random behavior, while at the same time is very sensitive to small changes in conditions.
So, there is no need for labeling relations with people, but somehow we are constantly trying to do it. What I would recommend to all of us is to provide safe orbits in our personal solar systems for those who seem to be our planets or any other bodies within it. It is crucial to recognize everyone’s position and give them credit for it. Define your interplanetary medium.
When chaos rules our relationships, we prefer to say it’s complicated, but the funny thing is that absence of rule is also a rule, and complexity is not synonym for complication.
In other words, do not live in denial of your own life. Do not let your selfesteem be jeopardized by or in calculation with your emotions for other people.
The thing is, there are people you share the universe with without knowing it, and they are not afraid of taking a position which belongs to them. Drop all its complicated scenarios, because at the bottom line, ‘complicated’ is shield for those who are afraid of invisible things.
There are people who are able to force themselves to contradict themselves in order to avoid conforming to their own taste. These kind of people are planets in my micro cosmos.